Word choice, tone, inflection. All can tell others where you are from. They can also tell others where you are coming from. Language can make it clear to others and ourselves, (if we are listening), whether our life perspective is one of noxious negativity or one of Pathological Positivity. Paying attention to how we speak […]
Change Your Language, Change Your Life Read More »
A couple in my office recently heard me say, “You need a new marriage.” She looked at me with surprise in her face, they were paying me to help them save their marriage, not to tell them they need a new one. “Keep your spouse, ” I responded, “and get a new marriage.” Better is
Upgrade Your Relationship Read More »
We enter relationships with the best of intentions. It doesn’t matter if it is a work, social, or even a romantic relationship. Our behaviors can be productive or not helpful. A Pathologically Positive person wants to make the most of all their relationships so let’s examine a pattern of negative behaviors that will cause any
Self-Destructive Behaviors in Relationships Read More »
This has been a very popular topic for my recent trainings and keynotes, and has a profound implication for leadership. Think about your own thinking for a moment and notice that whenever you are in a conversation, communication, or interaction with another person, your focus is somewhere. Paying attention to feelings, in the first column
The Influence Quadrant Read More »
Why do the holidays become stressful? Often the answer to that question is that we get tied up in all of the “to do”s and “by when”s that are implied in getting everything done. The holidays are for people, not the other way around. Let’s look at an acronym that can help us better handle
BELLS for Holiday Stress Read More »
This might be a misnomer – can we ever really balance it? Maybe the goal here is to be clear about priorities. Do you want to have everything balanced, or do you want to spend most of your time where it matters most at the right times? One way to prioritize your time, efforts, and
Work and Life Balance Read More »
We usually make resolutions because we want to change something in our lives, we want to improve. We believe that by making this change, our lives will be richer and we will be happier. So, why doesn’t everyone make resolutions? Changing means messing with our auto-pilot and that takes us out of our comfort zone.
Your New Year’s Stretch Read More »
Problems! We all have them. They vary by size, duration, intensity, and focus. You walk out to your car. It’s tilting a little funny and you notice that one of the rear tires is flat. You think, “Oh, great! I don’t need this today.” Your mind automatically goes to how much it is going to
Problem-Solving Life Hack Read More »
In my book, Pathological Positivity, I share a story Richard Paul Evans wrote about a traveler who visits a poor, run down kingdom. He gives the king and his subjects a magic spyglass that when they look through the glass, they do not see the dismal state of things, they see a beautiful scene of
Problems vs. Propportunities Read More »
Immaculée Ilibagiza crouched beside seven other women in a cramped twelve square foot bathroom in Rwanda for three months, being careful not to make a sound so the bloodthirsty Hutu killing raids would not discover them and thrust their bodies onto the piles of rotting corpses that were Immaculée’s family and fellow Tutsis. To accompaniment
