There are four specific things you can do right now to help your spouse with depression and they may seem to be simple. Just because something seems simple, it doesn’t mean it is easy. First, your job is to love them no matter what and even if… It isn’t to make sure that they anything. Let’s take the word love and break it down into 4 steps for each of the letters in the word LOVE. L stands for LISTEN. You have two ears and one mouth. Let’s use them in that particular ratio. This is so powerful. Just yesterday, I was meeting with a couple where they both had some things they needed to share. She started to share what was on her mind and he immediately started to speak over her and interrupt her and interject his own thinking and agendas. She immediately closed right down. Can you
Successful relationships are not magic, and they are not due to luck. At Live On Purpose TV you will find how to build better relationships with the YouTube video, “9 Secrets to Build a Healthy Relationship.” Dr. John Gottman has done some incredible research on marital relationships. His findings translate to almost any relationship we experience. He says that 70% of problems in relationship are unresolvable. How does that make you feel? Relieved or exasperated? All it really says is that we are different and can expect conflict because of our differences, but differences by themselves aren’t bad. They are what give us a reason to have a relationship. Differences are what make us interesting and relevant to each other. And, these differences were found in couples who reported themselves as happily married and those who reported not being happy in their marriage. The 9 Secrets to Build a Healthy Relationship will
Immaculée Ilibagiza crouched beside seven other women in a cramped twelve square foot bathroom in Rwanda for three months, being careful not to make a sound so the bloodthirsty Hutu killing raids would not discover them and thrust their bodies onto the piles of rotting corpses that were Immaculée’s family and fellow Tutsis. To accompaniment of screams and stench of death through the tiny bathroom window, Immaculée searched for and found love. Completely justified to hate the Hutus, Immaculée knew hate would only serve to perpetuate and prolong decades of hatred which caused the most devastating genocide of our time. With the saintly dignity and poise of a modern-day Mother Teresa, Immaculée shares a powerful message of love and forgiveness with audiences around the world who have far less reason to hate. Immaculée knew she could not control her enemies’ actions towards her, but she could choose and control her
David and Brenda have scheduled an appointment for some Pathologically Positive coaching. They are trying to save their twenty five year marriage. As is the case with far too many long-term couples, they are on the brink of divorce. There’s no real problem – and that is the problem. Brenda explains that she just doesn’t love David any more. She is pretty sure that he doesn’t love her either. David counters by telling me (not Brenda), “That’s silly. Of course I love her. She knows I love her.” Apparently, David is dead wrong about her knowing. Consider the oft’ told story of an elderly couple driving along together in their old Dodge pickup to the country store. Early in their marriage, this weekly trip was an anticipated outing where they would chat happily about the kids, the farm, a new calf. Now, in their later years, it has become a
This weekend is Mother’s Day. It is also the time for a funeral for a neighbor of mine. For both of these events, people will bring flowers. I was having a chat with a good friend of mine last week about how sometimes we give the least to those who matter most. He shared a story about a friend of his who died before he really was able to express his love and appreciation. “Give em flowers while they’re living!” is Dino’s advice. What a gift our life and relationships are. Don’t be so caught up in the stuff of your life, that you fail to connect with the ones who mean the most to you.