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Platitudes: Helpful or Don’t Go There

By M-Power
Good things come to those who wait. Time heals all wounds. Forgive and forget. What doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger. Money can’t buy happiness. It is what it is. You have heard these before. Platitudes.  They are said to help someone feel better.  They are said because we don’t know what to say.  They are said because we believe in them. Many are based on true, timeless principles and therefore, we use them. They are hard to hear when we are living in the muck, in the hard part of the journey where we don’t yet see the light at the end of the tunnel. (Did you catch the platitude?) When we have come out of the tunnel, we can see how the platitude might be relevant, but rarely are they comforting when we are in the sticky part of life. What might be most helpful to…
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Letting Go or Giving Up

By M-Power
Let’s take the example of someone in a relationship that is not serving them well.  It could be a relationship where you desire affection and want to spend time with your partner. They say they are committed, but they continue to schedule things ahead of you and don’t put you first. They avoid talking about the relationship and brush off your attempts to spend time together. People often tell me that they love this person and can’t let them go. Yet, they are disappointed, hurt and experience rejection multiple times a week if not daily. They see letting go of the relationship as giving up. Letting go and giving up are very different things. In letting something go, we are letting go of the expectation that the other party will be able to give us what we need. We are letting go so we can get something better. Giving up…
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There is No Comfort in Change and no Change in Comfort

By M-Power
“There is no comfort in change and no change in comfort.”  Since the last 16 months have been full of times of discomfort we should have grown a lot. This may not have happened. While I love the quote and think it is true that there is discomfort in change, there is a piece missing.  The intentionality. The purpose. The why. I talk to people who are experiencing discomfort, but doing nothing about it to change anything. You could say they are in their comfort zone, but they would tell you they definitely are not.  The perception is what needs to change and when it does, look out! Big changes are ahead.  As I always say, “It isn’t a choice until you see it as a choice.” Sometimes we can see the choice, but we still choose to stay where we are. It is safe and predictable, we know what…
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Comparing and Judging Positively

By M-Power
Don’t compare yourself to others. Don’t judge others. You hear it all the time. But we do. We can’t help it. We are constantly comparing and judging. It is part of being human. Try to shut it off for a day and see how many times you find yourself judging and comparing. We are taught to compare in school. It is a cultivated skill - to identify similarities and differences. Small and large scientific discoveries have been made through the process of comparing and contrasting, then asking questions, creating hypotheses and conducting experiments.  We willingly submit to competitions where we are compared to our peers and judged. This is the entire premise in some of the most popular shows in our culture. Then why are we told not to compare and judge? Let’s start with the definitions. Comparison: a consideration or estimate of the similarities or dissimilarities between two things…
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