I heard a great definition of an adult.

An adult is someone who gives more than they take.

There is another saying that the more you give the more you get.

In my years of counseling and coaching, the unhappiest people are those who expect things and don't look for opportunities to give.

There have also been some unhappy people who feel they give all the time without receiving. 

In relationships it can get tricky when people try to determine who is giving and who is taking. Those relationships are often in trouble. I call those balance sheet relationships and they never even out to the satisfaction of the partner measuring.

There are times in relationships when we need more and there are times when we need to be giving. Communication is key to any relationship. 

  • Be open and honest when you need more. 
  • Be specific with what you need. Partners aren't mind-readers and it is too much to expect another person to know what you are feeling. That just isn't fair. They are your feelings, own them and share them. 
  • Give without an expectation of receiving. After all, is it giving if you expect something back? That is transactional. Giving without expectation frees us from disappointment. Give with a happy heart.

Our goal of saving and enriching key relationships is supported by the principle of giving more than you take.