live on purpose – Page 20 – Dr. Paul Jenkins

Mar 03

Use This Method To Get Your Child To Listen And Behave

By DrPaul M-Power

Paul: We have a method to get your child to listen and behave. Let's jump on the first part of that. The listen part. And Vicki, you can help us out with this because you are a communications expert. You work with kids all the time. How do we get our kids to listen first of all? I think we need to change the quality of our communication. Vicki: Right. So, mean what you say and say what you mean. Paul: Exactly. I like the way I've heard this put before that you turn your words from garbage into gold. What effect are your words having currently on your kids? Does it feel like they are treating your words like garbage? Like they don't pay any attention? They don't care what you say? Maybe we could increase the quality of what you are saying so that they know what to…

Feb 28

The 3 Things Your Spouse Needs To Hear Every Day

By DrPaul M-Power

My whole job here is to save and enrich key relationships. I have learned some things about what makes a marriage work. Here are the three things your spouse needs to hear every day. To introduce the first thing that your spouse needs to hear every day, I'm turning to my friend Woody Woodward. Woody wrote a book called, Your Emotional Fingerprint. He also produced a movie where he gets into this theory and I think he's probably right. We are driven as human beings by what makes us feel important. With that context, let's go to what your spouse needs to hear from you. They need to hear some version of this phrase, my life is better because you are in it. People really do need to feel important and that they make a difference, especially in this context. Who could be more important to you on this whole…

Feb 26

How To Avoid A Nervous Breakdown

By DrPaul M-Power

I've got four very practical steps for you today to avoid a nervous breakdown. The first one has to do with your body. I want you to move, fuel, and rest your body appropriately. This is really important, folks. I get the question all the time, "Is this a psychological thing or is it tied to my health, my fitness?" Your brain is part of your body. It's your brain that controls your emotional experiences and how you handle your relationships and how you feel and what you say and what you do. It's part of your body. Moving your body is really important. Research shows that you need to have good aerobic activity going on at least 3 to 5 times a week for a sustained amount of time. You need to be moving your body with intention and intensity. This helps to purge some of the toxins out…

Feb 25

How To Stay Positive At Work

By DrPaul M-Power

What? You have a job? I emphasize that right up front because there are so many people who don't. That's really a first step to being positive at work is realizing that you've got work. How cool and amazing is that? Focus on that abundance and that's going to change some things as we start into a 5-day experiment. When I say experiment, I mean let's try this and see what happens. Pay attention to what changes inside of you and what changes you see in everyone around you because some of us don't have very positive places to work. Day one is the gratitude-focus day. So, this starts on your next full day at work. Look for things in your work environment the way it is right now without changing anything for which you are sincerely grateful. Find it. Ask your mind to look for things that are already…

Feb 24

How To Do Hard Things

By DrPaul M-Power

Learning how to do hard things will propel you forward faster than anything I know. A good place to start is to clarify why. Why do hard things? Because they are hard. Well, yeah. That's why we call them hard things. I've learned this: You get to have either hard-easy or easy-hard. And what I mean by that is often when we choose to do the easy thing now, we set ourselves up for a harder existence later on. Good example? "Yeah, I don't feel like exercising. That would be hard so I choose to do the easy thing now which is to avoid exercising.” Then I set myself up for a harder existence later on when my health crashes. I had a friend who told me, "You know what, Paul? You pay for your health now or later. One way or another, you pick one." You do an easy…

Feb 21

How To Manage Your Time Effectively

By DrPaul M-Power

Time management is a myth. Did that surprise you? I know that's a bold statement but think about it. Can you manage time? Do you have some control over the grand cosmic scheme of things that you can actually manage it? Some people think about saving time. Where would you keep it? You can't. All you can do with time really is spend it. And you have to spend all of it. You can't save it up for tomorrow. You can't really manage it or allocate it or move it here and there. So, it might be more accurate to look at priority management or task management because these are the ways that we spend our time. The most important consideration is to get clear about the difference between something being urgent and something being important, and most things are both. Urgent and important at some level. Think of it…

Feb 20

How To Heal From A Traumatic Experience

By DrPaul M-Power

Some of our viewers of Live On Purpose TV ask for help in healing from a traumatic experience. I think it's universal because we all have traumatic things happen to us. Have you noticed that stuff happens and it's not always stuff that we had planned and things just come out of left field sometimes and hit us upside the head? Now we didn't plan on it, we didn't ask for it. We didn't sign up for it. And it traumatizes us. It hurts us. Part of the reason this happens is because we live in a world where this stuff happens. Also, we are human beings who have flaws and weaknesses. Because of those weaknesses, we end up hurting each other, even if we don't intend to. Then there all of those experiences where somebody did intend to inflict trauma. These happen through a crime or some kind of…

Feb 19

School-Based Crime Prevention Programs

By DrPaul M-Power

School-based crime prevention programs can be enormously effective and I'll give you a few reasons why that is the case. 'Twas a dangerous cliff, as they freely confessed, Though to walk near its crest was so pleasant. But over its terrible edge there had slipped A duke and full many a peasant. So the people said something would have to be done, But their projects did not at all tally, Some said, ' Put a fence 'round the edge of the cliff'; Some, 'An ambulance down in the valley.' This is the beginning of a poem that was written over 100 years ago about prevention and how effective it is to prevent people from falling off of the cliff instead of just having an ambulance down in the valley. I'll share the rest of the poem with you at the end of the article. I'm a member of the board…

Feb 17

How To Teach Kids Table Manners?

By DrPaul M-Power

Paul: So, Vicki, here's the thing. Kids don't come pre-programmed to follow all of your rules and especially when it comes to something like table manners. Vicki: All manners are learned. Paul: If you don't believe this, just watch your animals. Vicki: Well... Remember that manners are really more related to our culture. Paul: Manners require a higher level of functioning too, because it has a lot of social innuendo that's woven into it. There's a lot of complexity that goes into manners, etiquette rules of behavior that affect how we interact with other people. Kids don't come by it naturally, so we teach them. Vicki: Yep. We have to explicitly teach table manners. Paul: Years ago I got to sing in a choir, and we were singing a song about children. The recurring theme in the song was, "How will they know unless we teach them?" Vicki: Right. Paul:…

Feb 14

How To Love Yourself: Three Powerful Ways

By DrPaul M-Power

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our jobs as parents or in our relationships and we are really good at loving people but not so good at loving ourselves. I have three powerful steps that you take to love yourself. I really like to think of love as a choice and as a verb, more than a feeling or a description. I think those things are certainly included in our conceptualization of love. What if we were to look at it as a choice first? Every interaction we have is going to fall on one side or the other. I don't think there's a neutral option. I think it's going to be either love or hate. And I use the word hate because people hate that word. Honestly, what's the opposite of love, anyway? Well, that is where hate comes in. Let’s get in line on one side or…