M-Power – Page 23 – Dr. Paul Jenkins

Mar 06

In Parenting, How Strict Is Too Strict?

By DrPaul M-Power

As parents, we constantly wonder if we're on track or not. In parenting, how strict is too strict? To answer this question. we've got to get into the motivation. That determines whether it's too strict or not. Before we dive too much into that, let's get a little bit more of a definition. Strict I think means being able to enforce appropriate limits and rules effectively without giving in or being inconsistent. This is how I'm defining it. Strict is not mean. To be a strict parent is not a bad thing. To be a mean parent, we got a problem. So, strict is not mean. Keep that in mind as we talk about this. It's still a legitimate question. How strict is too strict? Where are you coming from as a parent? What is your motivation? What is your job as a parent? It's so fun for me when…

Mar 05

Should I Spend Money On Personal Coaching?

By DrPaul M-Power

Maybe you're asking yourself, "Should I spend money on personal coaching?" The quick answer: It depends. And I'll tell you exactly what it depends on. Let's start by asking some good questions to hone in on whether that would be a good decision for you. Now, I sell personal coaching, it's my business. It's what I do, it's what I love. But I'm not here to sell you on coaching. I want you to make a good decision about whether you should spend your time and money on this kind of a proposition. Ask yourself: Number 1, "Do I want to learn a new skill or knowledge set?" Hmm, you probably do if you are considering personal coaching. But really, that's the purpose of doing it in the first place. Some people want to get into coaching and they have no idea of what it is that they are going…

Mar 04

What To Do When Your Child Hits You

By DrPaul M-Power

Vicki: With this particular topic we are going to assume we are talking about younger children. If there is an issue going on with an older child hitting you or a teenager, we need to take a whole different approach and your safety is most important. If we have young children, sometimes physical aggression is just kind of part of the developmental growth of this child. Paul: I think that's important to acknowledge because expecting kids to behave like an adult is an unrealistic expectation. So that's something you can adjust. Vicki: Now, just because it's part of their typical development, it doesn't mean that it's okay and we are just going to ignore it. Paul: We got to do something it. Vicki: What are we going to do about it? Paul: Because it's not good for your child to be hitting you or anyone else for that matter. In…

Mar 03

Use This Method To Get Your Child To Listen And Behave

By DrPaul M-Power

Paul: We have a method to get your child to listen and behave. Let's jump on the first part of that. The listen part. And Vicki, you can help us out with this because you are a communications expert. You work with kids all the time. How do we get our kids to listen first of all? I think we need to change the quality of our communication. Vicki: Right. So, mean what you say and say what you mean. Paul: Exactly. I like the way I've heard this put before that you turn your words from garbage into gold. What effect are your words having currently on your kids? Does it feel like they are treating your words like garbage? Like they don't pay any attention? They don't care what you say? Maybe we could increase the quality of what you are saying so that they know what to…

Feb 29

How To Talk So Your Teen Will Listen

By DrPaul M-Power

Paul: Vicki, maybe we ought to change this title to "How to listen so teens will listen?" Vicki: That is so important. So many kids just feel like, they are not heard. They are not validated. So, listening to them, even when it seems silly to you, especially then. Paul: You make a good point, Vicki, because I think teens get frustrated sometimes feeling like we don't take the time to actually connect with them. And so, we don't have the credibility that we need when we want them to listen to us because they feel like we have never really listened to them. This puts you in a powerful position as a parent. Vicki: Remember, everything they are going through is big to them. So, if you want them to listen to you, be sure you are listening to them in all the little things. Little to you, big…

Feb 28

The 3 Things Your Spouse Needs To Hear Every Day

By DrPaul M-Power

My whole job here is to save and enrich key relationships. I have learned some things about what makes a marriage work. Here are the three things your spouse needs to hear every day. To introduce the first thing that your spouse needs to hear every day, I'm turning to my friend Woody Woodward. Woody wrote a book called, Your Emotional Fingerprint. He also produced a movie where he gets into this theory and I think he's probably right. We are driven as human beings by what makes us feel important. With that context, let's go to what your spouse needs to hear from you. They need to hear some version of this phrase, my life is better because you are in it. People really do need to feel important and that they make a difference, especially in this context. Who could be more important to you on this whole…

Feb 26

How To Avoid A Nervous Breakdown

By DrPaul M-Power

I've got four very practical steps for you today to avoid a nervous breakdown. The first one has to do with your body. I want you to move, fuel, and rest your body appropriately. This is really important, folks. I get the question all the time, "Is this a psychological thing or is it tied to my health, my fitness?" Your brain is part of your body. It's your brain that controls your emotional experiences and how you handle your relationships and how you feel and what you say and what you do. It's part of your body. Moving your body is really important. Research shows that you need to have good aerobic activity going on at least 3 to 5 times a week for a sustained amount of time. You need to be moving your body with intention and intensity. This helps to purge some of the toxins out…

Feb 25

How To Stay Positive At Work

By DrPaul M-Power

What? You have a job? I emphasize that right up front because there are so many people who don't. That's really a first step to being positive at work is realizing that you've got work. How cool and amazing is that? Focus on that abundance and that's going to change some things as we start into a 5-day experiment. When I say experiment, I mean let's try this and see what happens. Pay attention to what changes inside of you and what changes you see in everyone around you because some of us don't have very positive places to work. Day one is the gratitude-focus day. So, this starts on your next full day at work. Look for things in your work environment the way it is right now without changing anything for which you are sincerely grateful. Find it. Ask your mind to look for things that are already…

Feb 24

How To Do Hard Things

By DrPaul M-Power

Learning how to do hard things will propel you forward faster than anything I know. A good place to start is to clarify why. Why do hard things? Because they are hard. Well, yeah. That's why we call them hard things. I've learned this: You get to have either hard-easy or easy-hard. And what I mean by that is often when we choose to do the easy thing now, we set ourselves up for a harder existence later on. Good example? "Yeah, I don't feel like exercising. That would be hard so I choose to do the easy thing now which is to avoid exercising.” Then I set myself up for a harder existence later on when my health crashes. I had a friend who told me, "You know what, Paul? You pay for your health now or later. One way or another, you pick one." You do an easy…

Feb 21

How To Manage Your Time Effectively

By DrPaul M-Power

Time management is a myth. Did that surprise you? I know that's a bold statement but think about it. Can you manage time? Do you have some control over the grand cosmic scheme of things that you can actually manage it? Some people think about saving time. Where would you keep it? You can't. All you can do with time really is spend it. And you have to spend all of it. You can't save it up for tomorrow. You can't really manage it or allocate it or move it here and there. So, it might be more accurate to look at priority management or task management because these are the ways that we spend our time. The most important consideration is to get clear about the difference between something being urgent and something being important, and most things are both. Urgent and important at some level. Think of it…